From Me to ********@***********.org

Good afternoon,

I came across your ad looking for a sponsor for your little league team. I am interested if you still need one. Let me know, and we can discuss the details.

Thanks,
Mike

From Joe ********* to Me:

Hey Mike,
My name is Joe. I have been the coach of this team and greatly appreciate the offer. We still do need a sponsor and I would like to hear what you have to offer. The league will not start up again until mid-April so we will have some time. Let me know what you were thinking for sponsorship, you can email or call me anytime at (***)***-****
Thanks,
Joe

From Me to Joe *********:

Joe,

I am glad to hear you are still interested. I would like to have my company name on your team's uniform and fence sign. How much would it cost to do this?

Mike

From Joe ********* to Me:

Hi Mike,
The cost to fully sponsor our team would be $800. It would cover ordering the jerseys and equipment. At the end of the season you will be recognized at our ceremony and will receive a framed photo of the team and your own uniform. What is your company's name and do you have a website?
Thanks,
Joe

From Me to Joe *********:

That sounds reasonable Joe. I am the founder of an adult film company called BarelyLegalSuperSluts. We specialize in 18+ amateur pornography and I would like to get our name out there. We plan on lanuching our site around April, so I think the timing would be perfect with your league. I can forward you our logo and we will discuss designs for the uniforms.

Mike

From Joe ********* to Me:

Mike,
Do you realize this sponsorship is for a little league team?
Joe

From Me to Joe *********:

Yes, you told me that. I think it is great that I'll be able to help kids enjoy America's greatest pastime.

From Joe ********* to Me:

and you honestly expect a bunch of kids to be sporting a jersey that says Barely Legal Super Sluts?

From Me to Joe *********:

Is it too long to fit on the jersey? We could just call them the Super Sluts for short as long as the sign on the field included the link to our website.

From Joe ********* to Me:

No that isn't the problem. This team is for kids and we can't have them wearing shirts that say Super Sluts on them. It is highly offensive and the league most likely wouldn't even allow it.

From Me to Joe *********:

How about we call them the Barely Legal Little Leaguers? I would include a free copy of our Super Sluts Slurping Loads DVD for every parent that attends the game. The DVD features over 3 hours of sluts with hilarious outtakes and alternate endings. I could even have a few of our stars come out and mud wrestle during the 7th inning stretch. I think it could pull in a lot more of an audience for your little league.

From Joe ********* to Me:

No! Thats even worse! Look Mike I appreciate you trying to help our team out but this is absolutely the wrong place to be advertising your porn. If you would still like to contribute you can but we cannot have your company name associated with our team.

From Me to Joe *********:

If this is how you treat every sponsor that wants to help your team out, you will never get any money. Sooner or later you are going to have to whore yourself out to someone, which is a valuable lesson learned in my Big Sluts: Big Loads DVD. I could give that one out to the parents instead, due to the educational value.

From Joe ********* to Me:

You just dont quit do you? Aint happening so go to hell!

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NOTE: Success! In honor of the Barely Legal Super Sluts: The Barely Legal Little Leaguers roller hockey team for Rutgers intramurals - undefeated in 2010.